Deviance
| SUNDAY, AUGUST
06, 2006
Deviance
This little series of drawings over the past three days were produced
from images on a porn site, whose identifier for the series was
deviance. The dictionary says deviant is an adjective that means
to diverge from the normal, especially in social or sexual behaviour.
What the hell is "the normal"?
And what, exactly, is normal social or sexual behaviour?
Depends on who you are, where you are, and how you grew up.
On what you've experienced and how you've been able to work with
it.
The shocker is, (and you can disagree as much as you want), it's
all okay because we're all fundamentally OK. But no, you'll say,
some things are just plain wrong. Who thinks so and why will diverge
greatly. But what is, is, and where you've been, you've been. Now
the question is, what do you want to do about it? How do you choose
to see it? What perspective would you like to have on it?
We can't change the past. We can't stop the pain from pushing us
to go beyond it. But we can change our perspectives, and pass on
more peaceful and less punishing visions, for ourselves and others.
We can't erase pornography from the Internet, make rape disappear
or eliminate pedophiles. At least not by ranting about what is wrong
in the world.
What we can do is work on cleaning up our own visions of sexuality,
by bringing love to a place where rules, indifference and exploitation
reign. We can forgive and we can give with renewed faith that we
are here to love because just look how awful hating makes us feel.
But it's not enough to draw it, to write about it, or to talk about
it. We have to walk the walk in the way we treat ourselves and others,
every minute of every day. It's when we deviate from this vision
of love that we suffer. Love is "the norm". Everything
else is just a desperate measure to find our way back to that.
Comments:
Sara said...
Dear Victoria, thanks for your writing, drawing approach to the
wonderful delicacy of sexual wonder & fulfillment. Yes, yes,
yes love is the norm... re- membering that in our daily lives amidst
the broken & wounded aspects of our fragile selves leads others
to accept, love is all there is- everything else is an illusion!
love is golden Sara :)
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